Living my life

My appearance shines without rubbing
But do you know
my heart was dull and cold
My appearance brings about laughter
But do you know
my heart was crying
I thought i could be strong
I thought i could pull through
I thought my life was my own
And i could decide my path
Could choose my road
Now i know
That the pain within me
Have slowly eaten away my heart
Slowly, slowly i am no longer able
Able to create the happiness that i had
I believe that i can bring it back
I just need time
But between denial and faith is a thin line
I know my line
Help me.