I want to be happy cause i was sad.

i went to a few JCs already.. haha.. to rank them, in the order of the best to me first,
VJC
TJC
SAJC
yepz.. so that's that.. but i havent went to MJC. although i like MJC for the high tech-ness of the school and the nice facilities and the ccas, i know i shuldnt be considering MJC so much because of WHO is going there.
Yea, how can i do that? haha.. so bad rite? somethimes i wonder how come i seem to have so deep feelings that does not seem to be so deep. i dunno? haha.. but i guess i'll leave that in God's hands, cause this is something that i cant do anything to. and i don't wanna do anything.. =P don't wanna ruin the friendship we already have ma.. haha..

oki.. next.. ah.. i tink finally i am facing up to it, the fear i have, the feelings i cant put down and the pain that had accumulated to so much i cant take it anymore. Guess that i'm becoming more emotional over the fears and the tears i swallowed. But still.. i dunno what to do.. cause i realli feel like burning all the notes, the letters, the poems i still keep in my box, but i just cant let it go over me.. but i've decided.. cause frm now on, i dun wanna b the moody sad gal anymore. yep. i wanna be the happi gal that i used to be. i dun wanna mind who is talking abt mi or even who is hating mi. yepz.. haha.. i wanna laugh freely like i used to be!

Hmm.. also.. what did i wanted to sae? actualli i forgot.. ah! i rmbr le! haha..

i've decided not to b involved in those ppl's fights or quarrals anymore.. well.. i've got involved and gt blamed for siding to one person when i didnt.. somemore i gt blamed frm BOTH sides for siding with the other side! well now.. i guess i cant help anymore.. haha.. that IS a big relieve.. haha.. now at least.. i don't have to keep thinking abt how to resolve the problem.. but now, i can at least be sure that i don't have special feelings towards any of them.. haha.. that's good! ^^

Hmm.. exams coming and i'm not really studying.. but.. i'm going to start nOW! haha.. from todae on.. i'm going choing like crazy.. esp this coming week since no nid to go sch.. i'm going try my best to get into VJC if possible, and if not, TJC or MJC.. but i can be quite sure of something.. if someone fails to get into MJc.. i'm not sure if i'll go there anymore.. haha.. that is, if i can go into VJC or TJC.. yepz.. for SA.. i don't think i'll b going there anymore.. so far.. haha.. yepz.. and don't haf taekwondo.. yes..

I want to be happy , cause I was sad. =D